Potato Mountain

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11/01/2009
(click any image to enlarge)

BIKE GOD Theatre

After a hiatus of 9½ years, the BIKE GODS return to the mystical Potato Mountain and get their groove on. In this modern twist on an old classic film, we juxtapose footage old and new, revealing the gradual transfiguration inflicted upon this old mountain by Father Time.

To maintain continuity, we have slowed the initial footage to ¼ actual speed, just as was done in the original motion picture. But to give our viewers a taste of the thrill of being a BIKE GOD, the speed jumps to ½ realtime after the old clip fades away. Anything closer to reality would be too much of a blur!

01_Clippers.jpg
The BIKE GODS, as mighty as Clippers, prepare for their second documented ride, and first documented triplet, in years.
02_Trunks.jpg
Byondo arrives, sporting the yellow jersey of many races easily won during his hiatus from in front of the BIKE GODS camera.
03_Chin.jpg
Zippy MacPhee clicks his chin strap into place, excited to be back with the triumvirate of original BIKE GODS. Lock and load, baby! Lock and load.
04_Shades.jpg
Byondo breaks out the shades, a new look for him. Will it work? Or will the mighty Potato decide otherwise?
05_Goo.jpg
Air Mapster's tire is injured, bleeding that blue-green BIKE GOD bike blood. It's time for some emergency repairs!
06_Ride.jpg
And they're off, for the first time as a group, on camera, in many years!
07_Curve.jpg
Byondo is feeling particularly spry today, leading the way up, up, up to The Great Potato.
08_Hill.jpg
Zippy MacPhee approaches the traditional break point at break neck speed.
09_MadeIt.jpg
Elapsed time: just half a second!
10_Tandem.jpg
Giddy over their first ride together in 6 years, Byondo and Zippy MacPhee decide to link up for a while and ride tandem.
11_StealthRepair.jpg
Can you spot the wily Byondo, stealthily making a lightning-fast repair? Only the camera of a BIKE GOD could possibly capture this rare moment!
12_OffAgain.jpg
And he's off again, leading the charge up the mountain. You'd never know that mere seconds ago, his bike was undergoing major surgery!
13_Rest.jpg
Sometimes you just have to stop and admire how great you are.
14_FinalClimb.jpg
But not for long, as Byondo pushes ahead for the final climb. He's a machine! Unstoppable.
15_Stick.jpg
Having reached the great summit, Byondo and Zippy enjoy the view with a pair of humans, after helping them up the mountain.
16_BikeView.jpg
The bikes take a well deserved rest, savoring a spectacular view of their own. Can you spot The Great Potato, master of all things Spudly on this mountain?
17_9.5Years.jpg
Byondo recreates a famous BIKE GOD photo from the days of old. Can you believe it's been 9½ years? He's looking good in this modern update to an old classic.
18_Potato.jpg
The Great Potato sits atop its high mountain perch, surveying all for miles below and wielding its awesome power. It's the Prince of Potatoes, the Sultan of Spuds, the Top Tater in all the land. This is one Tycoon Tuber that will never be a Mashed Monarch, an Aristocrat Au Gratin, or a Baked Baron. Put away your bacon bits and chives, this hot potato takes no prisoners!
19_HeadDown.jpg
After paying their respects to The Great Potato, the BIKE GODS head down the mountain and Insane® speeds.
20_BackDown.jpg
They're down to the bottom in the blink of an eye!
21_Finish.jpg
No braggadocio needed here, everyone knows the BIKE GODS are kings of the trail. A great ride once again!